January 15th: Holding Onto the Lessons of the Past

January 15th - Reflection for the day

I must never forget who and what I am and where I come from. I have to remember the nature of my illness and what it was like before I came to Gamblers Anonymous. I’ll try to keep the memory green, yet not spend my time dwelling morbidly on the past. I won’t be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful, and to believe that as I give to others, so others will give to me.

Can I ever afford to forget what it used to be like, even for one minute?

Today I Pray

May I never forget the painful days of my gambling addiction. May I never forget that the same misery awaits me if I should slip back into the old patterns. At the same time, may such backwards glances serve only to bolster my own present strength and the strength of others like me. Please, God, do not let me dredge up these recollections in order to outdo my fellow members with my war stories. Like others who are compulsive gamblers, I must be wary of my desire to be center stage in the spotlight.

Today I Will Remember

I do more when I don’t outdo.

My thoughts:

One of the greatest gifts of recovery is clarity—seeing the truth about who I was in my gambling days and who I am striving to become now. I can never afford to forget the desperation, the lies, and the losses. But I’ve learned that there’s a difference between remembering for strength and dwelling for self-pity.

When I recall the pain of my past, I do so to keep my recovery alive. I remind myself of the chaos I left behind, not to punish myself, but to honor how far I’ve come and to remain vigilant against the pull of old patterns. The stories of my struggles are powerful, but they’re not tools for boasting or comparing scars. They are reminders of my shared humanity and the strength that comes from humility.

Recovery has taught me balance—remembering without being trapped by regret and embracing the beauty of today without becoming complacent. My past is a teacher, not a prison. It’s a map that guides me, showing me where I should never return and where I’m capable of going.

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